brain dump

life here has made me realize many things, appreciate many things, and grow to love many things...

-i try to talk to my family about once (if not more) a week. i have always cared for them so much, but being here has made me love them much much much more. being around these children everyday, who have no real family, who have been abandoned, neglected, or parents who don't have the necessities to take care of the children. family is the most important thing in my life. i will never ever take them for granted. my grandma and grandpa lewis, and my auntie glenna, they are lights in my life, amazing, caring, loving people. i love them.

-this week we lost a baby and got a new baby at one of the orphanages. the little baby boy, six months old, passed away wednesday morning. when i got home from shift at another orphanage one of the girls told us what had happened. i was in complete shock. i thought i'd start crying, because that is usually what i do when i am sad, but really i am happy for his little soul. sounds opposite, i know. BUT- he is in a happier place, a celestial being. life here wasn't headed in the happiest direction. being abandoned as a newborn, he didn't have much to look foward to. r.i.p. in peace little one. this last monday we the police brought a new baby to the same orphanage. he turned a week old this last friday. he was three days old when the police found him in a trash can. i had night shift wednesday night after the news of the death of the baby, but i had the opportunity to take care of new life. i have never done this before, but his little body, and spirit, put me on the edge of tears. it was a feeling i will never forget.

-i love my friends. the words and support they give me comfort me. ali, i know you have had a rough last few weeks, but i love you girl, and i'm grateful for you! hillary, you are such a happy person and it makes me happy, i love you girl. to any other friends i haven't mentioned, you know who you are, you have made me a better person, and i appreciate that.

-living with thirteen other girls has been sort of a challenge for me. i have never lived away from home, or with roommates for that matter. i've learned paitence, forgiveness, and how to just let people be who they are.